15 ways I embraced my hair journey: from damage and neglect to self-love

For years, my hair was a source of frustration.

Staring back at me from the mirror were split ends, breakage, and a dullness that no amount of product seemed to fix. It was a physical reflection of neglect, a history of harsh chemical treatments and scorching heat tools. This journey wasn’t just about strands of hair; it was deeply emotional. Dealing with damaged hair can impact self-esteem, making you feel like you have to hide. But embarking on a hair journey is an incredible act of self-love. It’s about choosing to nurture and understand yourself, starting from the roots up. It’s a process of unlearning damaging habits and embracing the beautiful, unique texture you were born with.

My path from damage to self-love was paved with patience, education, and a lot of kindness to myself. Here are the 15 ways I transformed my relationship with my hair and, in turn, with myself.

I Accepted Where I Was Starting From

The first step was to stop wishing my hair was different and accept its current state. I took pictures to document the damage. It was difficult, but it gave me a realistic starting point. Acknowledging the problem without judgment is the foundation for any meaningful change.

I Learned My Hair Type and Porosity

Not all hair is the same. I dove into research to understand my specific hair type (the curl pattern) and its porosity (how well it absorbs and holds moisture). This knowledge was a game-changer. It allowed me to choose products and techniques that actually worked for me, instead of blindly following trends.

I Broke Up with Extreme Heat

Heat styling was my biggest vice. Research indicates that a substantial number of individuals experience hair damage from the use of heat tools. I learned that temperatures above 350°F (175°C) can cause irreversible damage to the hair’s protein structure. I committed to air-drying most of the time and used a diffuser on low heat and low speed only when necessary, always with a quality heat protectant.

I Scheduled a “Big Chop”

To get rid of the most severely damaged parts of my hair, I opted for a significant haircut. It was scary but liberating. Cutting away the dead ends was a symbolic act of letting go of the past and making space for healthy new growth.

I Created a Consistent Washing Routine

I stopped washing my hair every day, which was stripping its natural oils. I developed a routine—washing just two or three times a week—using a sulfate-free shampoo and a deeply hydrating conditioner. Consistency is what helps your scalp and hair find a healthy balance.

I Made Deep Conditioning a Non-Negotiable Ritual

Once a week, I dedicate time to a deep conditioning treatment. This ritual is my moment of self-care. It replenishes moisture, strengthens the hair shaft, and has made a visible difference in the softness and shine of my hair.

I Upgraded My Sleep Routine

Did you know that cotton pillowcases can cause friction, leading to breakage and frizz? I switched to a silk pillowcase. The smooth surface allows hair to glide, reducing tangles and protecting my hair while I sleep. A silk or satin bonnet is another great option.

I Read Ingredient Labels Religiously

I started treating my hair products like food—I read the labels. I learned to avoid harsh sulfates, drying alcohols, and certain silicones that can build up on the hair. Instead, I look for nourishing ingredients like glycerin, shea butter, and natural oils.

I Embraced My Natural Texture

This was perhaps the most empowering step. I stopped fighting my waves and curls. There’s a growing movement toward embracing natural hair, and I joined it. Learning to style my natural texture helped me see its beauty, and I received more compliments than I ever did when I was straightening it.

I Got Regular Trims

To maintain health and prevent split ends from traveling up the hair shaft, I started getting trims every 10-12 weeks. It seems counterintuitive when you want to grow your hair long, but trimming away the damage is essential for healthy length retention.

I Nourished My Hair from the Inside Out

Healthy hair starts from within. I focused on a balanced diet rich in vitamins and minerals known to support hair growth, like biotin, iron, and zinc. Drinking plenty of water also plays a crucial role in hydrating your body, including your hair follicles.

I Found a Stylist Who Understood My Goals

Finding a hairstylist who specializes in natural hair and understands the science behind hair care is invaluable. As trichologist Bridgette Hill explains, “A good stylist is a partner in your hair health journey. They should educate you, support your goals, and help you create a regimen that works for your lifestyle.”

I Practiced Patience

Hair doesn’t transform overnight. On average, hair grows about half an inch per month. There were days I felt discouraged. But I reminded myself that this is a marathon, not a sprint. Taking monthly progress pictures helped me see how far I had come, even when it felt slow.

I Unfollowed Social Media Accounts That Made Me Feel Bad

I curated my social media feed to be a source of inspiration, not comparison. I unfollowed accounts that promoted unrealistic hair standards and followed creators who celebrated hair textures similar to mine. This small change had a huge positive impact on my mindset.

I Redefined My Definition of “Good Hair”

I let go of the idea that “good hair” meant straight, sleek, or perfectly tamed. Good hair is healthy hair. It’s hair that is cared for, respected, and loved, whatever its texture or type. My hair is an extension of me, and celebrating it is celebrating myself.

A Journey of Self-Acceptance

This hair journey has been about so much more than just aesthetics. It has been a powerful lesson in self-acceptance and the transformative power of embracing your natural beauty. Learning to care for my hair taught me how to care for myself with the same patience and dedication. If you are struggling with your hair, know that you are not alone. The path to healthy, beautiful hair is also a path back to yourself. Embrace it, be patient, and watch yourself bloom.

16 Best Jobs for Pregnant Women

16 Best Jobs for Pregnant Women

Pregnancy is a transformative and joyous period in a woman’s life, but it comes with unique challenges and demands. One of the most crucial aspects during this time is ensuring a healthy work-life balance.

Finding the right job during pregnancy is not just about earning an income; it’s about maintaining your health, well-being, and peace of mind.